a tale of two hearts


This week was so good, exactly what we needed. So easy, such a great spot. 

A few things I don't want to forget:

- Watching you and Esther and the connection she has with you, the way you two look at each other. 
- Spending lots of one on one time with Lucas, being able to run around with him the way I could before all the bed rest. That was amazing, both physically being able to run faster than him for the first time in over 10 months and the goofing around with him which I've missed so much.
- Running onto the beach with Lucas in the rain at 6pm just so we could dive under the waves and run back to the apartment. I hope he'll continue enjoying doing crazy little things like that with me as he gets older. 
- Waking up one morning and wondering why my left glute was so sore. And then discovering at lunch that yours was too - "Oh wait, bowling from yesterday!"
- Having my first bath with Esther. Lucas bringing popcorn while we were in the bath!
- Having lots and lots of cuddles with Esther, being able to sit and soak her up without any mummy guilt. 
- Making Esther giggle before bed. Seeing Esther in a swing, going down a slide. Watching her take the world in as she sat in the pram. 
- Catching up with Bec and Dave.
- Setting up our beach tent and feeling like "Yep, we're officially a family, look at us, we're beach tenting it and all" 
- Esther's giggles in the pool as the girls were diving under and jumping up. Oh man, that was magical. 
- You feeding Esther on the balcony and then having baths with her.
- Having to beg Lucas to go to the beach each day and then on our last day, 3 hours before our flight he turns to me and says "Hey Mum, lets go to the beach!". Throwing our swimmers on and sprinting across the road to the beach, watching how confident and proud he was to be jumping waves by himself for for the first time. 
- Staying up with you and watching "Married at First Sight" for the first time and laughing about, well pretty much everything. 
- Esther sitting up so confidently and playing with the Duplo. 
- Having Esther sit in a high chair at the table with us and how thrilled and proud she looked to be there.
- That view. Oh man, that was nice.
- Watching incredible surfing from our lounge room. That was so incredible and totally unexpected. Learning that where there are pro surfers you also find people with incredible camera gear, which makes sense but it had never really hit me before just how surfing and photography go hand in hand. After watching people surf for a week I got it and was super frustrated that all I had with me was my 35mm lens. 
- Being inspired to add "lean how to surf" to my bucket list. We both know how reluctant I am to add something to that list and how serious I am about it when I do.
- You telling me that Lucas had said "Dad, do you know Mum's a really good mum " and then pausing and saying "Oh you're a good Dad too!" It made me realise how much we had both missed spending time just goofing around the way we use too.
- Esther's little tongue - need I say more!! Looking over the photos and discovering that I bite my tongue as I smile at her, which I'd never really noticed before.
- Bowling. I was so surprised by how much Lucas loved it. The little jumps of excitement he'd do and the way he'd encourage us both when it was our turn. 
- Me asking Lucas "Wow, did you get to meet pro surfers!!" and him replying with genuine disappointment in his voice "Not really mum, we just chatted a little and took a photo". Oh the disappointment, poor guy, he later explained that he thought he'd get to see them surf and then hang out with them. 

I love us. Love doing life together.